Elf Yourself. Turn Yourself Into An Elf
Friday, November 30, 2007
Elf Yourself. Turn Yourself Into An Elf
Posted by
Bonnie
at
9:04 AM
0
comments
Labels: Cool, Funny Pictures
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Chippendales 30th Reunion Pictures
Chippendales 30th Reunion Pictures

Here they are today...eat your heart out

Posted by
Bonnie
at
12:48 PM
0
comments
Labels: Funny Pictures
Wacky Warning Labels. Weird Warning Labels. Are We That Stupid Warning Labels
Wacky Warning Labels. Weird Warning Labels. Are We That Stupid Warning Labels
On a blanket from Taiwan:
Not to be used as protection from a tornado.
Warning on fireplace log:
Caution -- Risk of Fire.
A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists:
Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.
Warning on an electric router made for carpenters:
This product not intended for use as a dental drill.
On a bottle of shampoo for dogs:
Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.
On a hair dryer:
Do not use in shower.
On Marks & Spencer bread pudding
Product will be hot after heating.
On a string of Chinese made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts.
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions - open packet, eat nuts.
On some frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: defrost.
On a hotel provided shower cap:
Fits one head.
On Nytol Nighttime Sleep-Aid:
Warning: May cause drowsiness.
Warning on a cartridge for a laser printer:
Do not eat toner.
A wheel 13" a wheelbarrow warns:
Not for highway use
Can of self-defense pepper spray warns:
May irritate eyes.
Warning on a Conair Pro Style 1600 hair dryer:
Do not use in shower. Never use while sleeping.
Silly Putty package warning:
Not for use as earplugs.
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
Baby stroller warning:
Remove child before folding.
Household iron warns:
Never iron clothes while they are being worn.
A fireplace lighter cautions:
Do not use near fire, flame or sparks.
A handheld massager warns consumers:
Don't use while sleeping or unconscious.
Warning on underarm deodorant:
Do not spray in eyes.
Cardboard car sun shield that keeps sun off the dashboards warns
Do not drive with sun shield in place
Warning on a sharpening stone:
Knives are sharp.
Bottle water label warns:
Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth.
On a box or rat poison
Warning: Has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice.
On a Domino's Pizza box
Caution: Contents hot!
Toilet bowl cleaning brush warns:
Do not use orally.
An electric cattle prods warns:
For use on animals only
A can of air freshner warns:
Keep out of reach of children and teenagers
Cheap rubber ball toy warning:
Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball.
Caution on a package of dice:
Not for human consumption.
In the manual of a chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hand.
Stamped on the barrel of a .22 calibre rifle:
Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death.
Instructions for an electric thermometer:
Do not use orally after using rectally.
On the wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack:
Remove plastic before eating.
A TV remote controller warns:
Not dishwasher safe.
Posted by
Bonnie
at
11:15 AM
0
comments
Labels: Fucked Up, Funny Lists, To Bad So Sad
Stupid Lawsuits That Won BIG Money. The Stella Awards
Stupid Lawsuits That Won BIG Money. The Stella Awards
That's right; these are awards for the most outlandish lawsuits and verdicts in the U.S. You know, the kinds of cases that make you scratch your head. So keep your head scratcher handy.
Here are the Stella's lawsuits for the year of 2007:
7TH PLACE:
Kathleen Robertson of Austin,Texas was awa rded $80,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The store owners were u nderstandably surprised by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son.
6TH PLACE:
Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles, California won $74,000 plus medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.
Go ahead, grab your head scratcher.
5 TH PLACE:
Terrence Dickson, of Bristol,Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to open. Worse, he couldn't re-enter the house because the door co nnecting the garage to the house locked when Dicks on pulled it shut. Forced to sit for eight, count 'em, EIGHT, days on a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner's insurance company claiming undue mental Anguish. Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson $500,000 for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish.
Keep scratching. There are more...
4TH PLACE:
Jerry Williams, of Little Rock , Arkansas , garnered 4th Place in the Stella's when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being bitten on the butt by his next door neighbor's beagle - even though the beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard Williams did not get as m uch as he asked for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the fence into the yar d and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun.
Grrrrr ... Scratch, scratch .
3RD PLACE:
Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania because a jury ordered a Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500 after she slipped on a spilled soft drink and broke her tailbone. The reason the soft drink was on the floor: Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument. What ever happened to people being responsible for their own actions?
Scratch, scratch, scratch. Hang in there; there are only two more Stella's to go...
2ND PLACE:
Kara Walton, of Claymont,Delaware sued the owner of a night club in a nearby city because she fell from the ba throom window to the floor, knocking out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge, the jury said the night club had to pay her $12,000....oh, yeah, plus dental expenses. Go figure.
1ST PLACE: (May I have a fanfare played on 50 kazoos please)
This year's runaway First Place Stella Award winner was Mrs. Merv Grazinski, of Oklahoma City,Oklahoma, who purchased a new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On her first trip home, from an OU football game, having driven on to the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go to the back of th e Winnebago to make herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the motor home left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winneba go for not putting in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually leave the driver's seat while the cruise control was set. The Oklahomajury awarded her, are you sitting down, $1,750,000 PLUS a new motor home. Winnebago actually changed their manuals as a result of this suit, just incase Mrs. Grazinski has any relatives who might also buy a motor home.
Posted by
Bonnie
at
11:05 AM
0
comments
Labels: Fucked Up, Funny Lists, To Bad So Sad
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Most Dangerous Drug in the World. See a Person High On Scopolamine
Most Dangerous Drug in the World. Watch a Person High On Scopolamine
The following is a video of three people actually high on Scopolamine. The people in this video apparently ate the seeds of the borrechero tree, becoming highly intoxicated.
Firsthand Experience of Scopolamine Ingestion: (taken by a 35 year old male, 185lbs, 7g of Scopolamine)
1.)+30 minutes: Onset of peripheral anti-cholinergic symptoms, e.g. dry mouth, blurred vision, dilated pupils, hyperpyrexia, red hands and feet and flushed face. Some noticeable ataxia and poor sentence construction.
2.)+1 hour: Definite delirium setting in. Substantial decrease of muscle tone, resulting in clumsy walking. Much banging into walls and stumbling over nothing whatsoever. Heart-rate is very fast.
3.)+2 hours: Muscles almost completely relaxed, so that walking is now impossible (can barely crawl, however). Forehead feels feverish. Hearing is impaired. Pupils are monstrously dilated. Colors are very rich and bright, as with Cannabis intoxication. Visual perceptual resolution is poor; text appears blurry no matter how hard subject squints or concentrates. Depth perception is severely impaired, making it impossible to appropriately reach for even nearby objects without over- or under-reaching.
4.)+3 hours: The walls are breathing; objects are swirling about and taking on living forms, making for a generally nightmarish scenario. Subject has NO INSIGHT WHATSOEVER; these are REAL HALLUCINATIONS, unlike the fanciful visions and distortions that one obtains on indoleamine psychedelic drugs. Terrifying.
5.)+4 hours and onwards: Muscles are so weak that even lifting a finger seems to take superhuman strength. Subject feels an oppressive force pinning him down on the bed, paralyzing him. Visual field is completely obscured by various living forms and blurry splotches. Throat is parched; tongue feels sandy. Subject does not know where he is; does not know whether he is even awake or dreaming, does not know who he is; does not know why he feels so shitty; etc. Subject pledges his soul to the demon who is sitting on him in exchange for a refreshing drink of water. The demon takes his soul, doesn't provide the agreed-upon water. Subject resigns himself to eternal damnation.
6.)+16 hours: Subject finds himself at work, utterly perplexed. He realizes that he is in the middle of a conversation with someone, asks for that person to repeat what was just said. Somehow manages to handle everything at work without stirring too much suspicion. Vaguely recalls waking up in the morning midway down the basement stairs. Luckily, no injuries other than bruises. Concludes that he must fallen down the stairs while sleepwalking. Later that day, subject is shocked to discover that he had completed a sizeable amount of rather demanding paperwork earlier in the workday, with no recollection of even being delegated this task. Because of blurry vision, reading is somewhat difficult.
7.)+20 hours: Subject comes home, sees a bowl of cooked rice sitting in the refrigerator - does not recall ever cooking rice. Also finds a toothbrush and some floss (most of it pulled out and then wrapped around the dispenser) on his nightstand, and a remote control in the bathroom. Pupils are still fucking hugely dilated. Subject has paranoid ideation about various entities lurking throughout his house, sees fleeting creatures in his peripheral vision.
8.)+48 hours: Subject's memory and sanity are more or less back to normal, but he is deeply shaken and full of regret for ever thinking of experimenting with an ant cholinergic deliriant. –Erowid.com
9.) The following is a link to a more alarming story of a higher dose of the drug: http://www.erowid.org/experiences/exp.php?ID=54912
In Columbia alone, there are over 50,000 reported cases of Scopolamine drugging, although rarely does this receive media attention, in Columbia or elsewhere. The drug is used almost primarily by criminals as a way of making victims so docile that they have been known to help thieves rob their own homes and empty their own bank accounts. Additionally, women have been drugged repeatedly and held as sex slaves, or have been convinced to willingly give up their own children. The most horrifying side effect of the drug is not is ability to make zombies of its victims, but the complete amnesia it causes.
“BOGOTA, Colombia (Reuters) - The last thing Andrea Fernandez recalls before being drugged is holding her newborn baby on a Bogota city bus. Police found her three days later, muttering to herself and wandering topless along the median strip of a busy highway. Her face was badly beaten and her son was gone. In the case of Fernandez, the mother of three was rendered submissive enough to surrender her youngest child.”
Scopolamine can be administered easily into a victim’s drink, or food. It’s powdered form can also simply be blown in a victims general direction. The result of this type of drugging is typically either immediate death from overdose, or severe intoxication. There have been reported cases of women putting scopolamine on their breasts, and then enticing their male victims into licking their breasts, thereby drugging them.
Interesting Scopolamine Facts:
1.) Scopolamine was used as a chemical defense in cocaine cases: This is because the chemical formula for cocaine, C17H21NO4, is identical to that of Scopolamine. Both have the same molecular formula but have differing structures, causing the different effects of each drug.
2.) In a 1963 Supreme Court Case, Townsend vs. Sain, it was concluded that “serum-induced confession” was a form of torture and therefore unconstitutional. The ruling was based on the confessions of Townsend, whose admissions were made under the influence of Scopolamine.
3.) In 1922 it occurred to Robert House, a Dallas, Texas obstetrician, that the drug scopolamine could be employed in the interrogation of suspected criminals. Scopolamine was later used by Dr. House on criminals under interrogation in Dallas. His experiment attracted wide attention, and the idea of a "truth" drug was thus launched upon the public consciousness.
4.) In the early 1920’s, a Dallas obstetrician named Dr. Robert House concluded that Scopolamine could be used to interrogate criminals, based on his experiences with women under the influence of the drug. Dr House was later allowed to conduct experiments with the drug on criminals in interrogation, which received wide attention, catapulting the idea of a “truth serum” into public consciousness.
5.) Treatment with scopolamine hydrobromide blocks muscarinic cholinergic receptors and produces a rapid, robust antidepressant response in depressed patients with unipolar or bipolar depression, Maura L. Furey, Ph.D., reported at an international congress sponsored by the World Federation of Societies of Biological Psychiatry -http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-166189623.html
6.) Early in this century physicians began to employ scopolamine, along with morphine and chloroform, to induce a state of "twilight sleep" during childbirth. In this twilight sleep, doctors noticed patients answered questions accurately and provided exceptionally candid answers.
-Reuters via cursor.org.
7.) Scopolamine was one of a number of drugs used in a now declassified secret CIA program to discover mind control drugs. The project was known as Project MK Ultra. -http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_MKULTRA
8.) Scopolamine is often taken as one half of a medication known as “ScopeDex,” which is a combination of Scopolamine and Dexedrine. It is given to astronauts and people in similar training to prevent nausea and vomiting.
What's Up With That
Posted by
Bonnie
at
1:12 PM
0
comments
Labels: Fucked Up, Funny Video, To Bad So Sad
Sex Scandal Hits Atlanta-Area Megachurch
Sex Scandal Hits Atlanta-Area Megachurch
The 80-year-old leader of a suburban Atlanta megachurch is at the center of a sex scandal of biblical dimensions: He slept with his brother's wife and fathered a child by her.
Members of Archbishop Earl Paulk's family stood at the pulpit of the Cathedral of the Holy Spirit at Chapel Hill Harvester Church a few Sundays ago and revealed the secret exposed by a recent court-ordered paternity test.
In truth, this is not the first — or even the second — sex scandal to engulf Paulk and the independent, charismatic church. But this time, he could be in trouble with the law for lying under oath about the affair.
The living proof of that lie is 34-year-old D.E. Paulk, who for years was known publicly as Earl Paulk's nephew.
"I am so very sorry for the collateral damage it's caused our family and the families hurt by the removing of the veil that hid our humanity and our sinfulness," said D.E. Paulk, who received the mantle of head pastor a year and a half ago.
D.E. Paulk said he did not learn the secret of his parentage until the paternity test. "I was disappointed, and I was surprised," he said.
Earl Paulk, his brother, Don, and his sister-in-law, Clariece, did not return calls for comment.
A judge ordered the test at the request of the Cobb County district attorney's office and the Georgia Bureau of Investigation, which are investigating Earl Paulk for possible perjury and false-swearing charges stemming from a lawsuit.
The archbishop, his brother and the church are being sued by former church employee Mona Brewer, who says Earl Paulk manipulated her into an affair from 1989 to 2003 by telling her it was her only path to salvation. Earl Paulk admitted to the affair in front of the church last January.
In a 2006 deposition stemming from the lawsuit, the archbishop said under oath that the only woman he had ever had sex with outside of his marriage was Brewer. But the paternity test said otherwise.
So far no charges have been filed against Earl Paulk. District Attorney Pat Head and GBI spokesman John Bankhead would not comment.
The shocking results of the paternity test are speeding up a transformation already under way in the church after more than a decade of sex scandals and lawsuits involving the Paulks, D.E. Paulk said.
"It was a necessary evil to bring us back to a God-consciousness," said the younger Paulk, explaining that the church had become too personality-driven and prone to pastor worship.
The flashy megachurch began in 1960 with just a few dozen members in the Little Five Points neighborhood of Atlanta. Now, it is in the suburbs on a 100-acre expanse, a collection of buildings surrounding a neo-Gothic cathedral.
For years the church was at the forefront of many social movements — admitting black members in the 1960s, ordaining women and opening its doors to gays.
At its peak in the early 1990s, it claimed about 10,000 members and 24 pastors and was a media powerhouse. By soliciting tithes of 10 percent from each member's income, the church was able to build a Bible college, two schools, a worldwide TV ministry and a $12 million sanctuary the size of a fortress.
Today, though, membership is down to about 1,500, the church has 18 pastors, most of them volunteers, and the Bible college and TV ministry have shuttered — a downturn blamed largely on complaints about the alleged sexual transgressions of the elder Paulks.
In 1992, a church member claimed she was pressured into a sexual relationship with Don Paulk. Other women also claimed they had been coerced into sex with Earl Paulk and other members of the church's administration.
The church countered with a $24 million libel suit against seven former church members. The lawsuit was later dropped.
Jan Royston, who left the church in 1992, started an online support group for former members to discuss their crushed faith and hurt feelings.
"This is a cult. And you escape from a cult," she said. "We all escaped."
These days, Earl Paulk has a much-reduced role at the cathedral, giving 10-minute lectures as part of Sunday morning worship each week.
"My uncle is 100 percent guilty, but his accusers are guilty as well," D.E. Paulk said, declining to talk further about the lawsuits
Posted by
Bonnie
at
12:58 PM
0
comments
Labels: Fucked Up
"The Science Guy" Wants to Send "Wife" to the Moon
Bill Nye "The Science Guy" Wants to Send "Wife" to the Moon
Bill Nye "The Science Guy" is asking a Los Angeles County judge for protection from his faux wife, after she pulled a late night raid on his flower and produce gardens. One needn't be scientific to know that marriage isn't going well!
TMZ obtained a request for a temporary restraining order, first reported by The Smoking Gun, filed by Nye against his pseudo-wife of just one year, Blair Tindall. In the handwritten documents, Bill claims his estranged gal showed up at his Studio City home on Labor Day, dressed in black and armed with two large bottles "filled with some sort of solvent" to do damage to his garden, which he says provides "food produce."
And it gets crazier!
Nye also alleges that the herbicide was "quite toxic" and thought Tindall might have squirted him in the eyes with it had she gotten closer. Not very Nyes!
Tindall responded to the order by describing the midnight bad vegetables incident as a "foolish, sophomoric act of poor judgment" brought on by a series of personal and family problems. Blair explained that the reason for the attack was that she saw their rose garden on the "Living with Ed" TV show. She claims Nye picked a rose and gave it to Ed Begley's wife on the show and discussed how he had no woman in his life. She also strongly denied being a threat to Nye, and accuses him of "emotional cruelty." The out of orbit couple "wed" last February in a curious ceremony officiated by Pastor Rick Warren, author of "The Purpose Driven Life."
Posted by
Bonnie
at
12:49 PM
2
comments
Labels: To Bad So Sad
Stupid Kid Sticks face In Fire Ant Hole. Dumb Trick Video
Stupid Kid Sticks face In Fire Ant Hole
This is a video in which a stupid kid sticks his face in a fire ant hill. The results are just what he deserved. This is really stupid and dumb and well, do not try this at home
http://view.break.com/401668 - Watch more free videos
Posted by
Bonnie
at
12:33 PM
0
comments
Labels: Fucked Up, Funny Video
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Women Who Kill. Evil Women. Top 10 Most Evil Women in History
People tend to focus on the evil, rotten, killer men in the world and forget some of the truly evil rotten, killer women that have lived. Here is a top 10 list of not just women serial killers, but other utterly despicable women who have caused tragedy in many people’s lives. Here are the top 10 most evil women in history.
10. Queen Mary I Born: 1516; Died: 1558
Mary (first child of Henry VIII), the fourth crowned monarch of the Tudor dynasty, after the uncrowned Jane Grey and before Elizabeth I, is remembered for briefly returning England to Roman Catholicism. To this end, she had numerous religious dissenters executed; as a consequence, she is often known as Bloody Mary. Numerous Protestant leaders were executed in the so-called Marian Persecutions. Many rich Protestants chose exile and around 800 left the country. It should be noted that Elizabeth I shares position 10 on this list for her equally bad behavior.
9. Myra Hindley Born: 1942; Died: 2002
Myra Hindley was an English serial killer involved in the “Moors murders” with her partner Ian Brady. Together, Brady and Hindley took part in the abduction, sexual abuse, torture, and murder of three children, aged 10-12, and two adolescents, aged 16 and 17, from the Manchester area. Hindley was arrested when a suitcase containing incriminating evidence was recovered from the left-luggage depot at Manchester Central Station. Part of the evidence was a tape recording of the murder of one of their victims in which the girl is heard screaming whilst Hindley and Brady torture her. During her five final days of freedom, she developed an arrogant attitude, which was subsequently regarded as her trademark. In a 2006 television documentary about Hindley’s years behind bars, Police secretary Sandra Wilkinson said that she distinctly remembered Hindley and her mother Nellie, leaning against the wall of the courthouse and eating a cream cake. While her mother appeared to be in obvious distress, Hindley seemed to be almost indifferent to her situation.
8. Isabella of Castile Born: 1451; Died: 1504
Isabella I of Spain and her husband, Ferdinand II of Aragon, laid the foundation for the political unification of Spain under their grandson, Carlos I of Spain (Charles V, Holy Roman Emperor). She is well known as the patron of Christopher Columbus. At her request, Tomás de Torquemada became the first Inquisitor General of the Spanish Inquisition and began a policy of religious cleansing. On March 31, 1492, the Alhambra Decree for the expulsion of the Jews and Muslims was issued. Approximately 200,000 people left Spain. Others converted, often only to be persecuted further by the Inquisition investigating Judaizing conversos. In 1974, Pope Paul VI opened her cause for beatification. This places her on the path toward possible sainthood. In the Catholic Church, she is thus titled Servant of God.
7. Beverly Allitt Born: 1968
Beverley Gail Allitt, dubbed the ‘Angel of Death’, was an English paediatric nurse who was convicted of killing four children and injuring five others, in 1991, on the children’s ward of Grantham and Kesteven Hospital, Lincolnshire where she worked. She has since become one of Britain’s most notorious female serial killers. Her main method of murder was to inject the child with insulin or potassium to cause cardiac arrest; when unable to obtain the injections, she suffocated the child. Allitt had attacked thirteen children, four fatally, over a fifty-eight day period before she was brought up on charges for her crimes. Allitt’s motives have never been fully explained. According to one theory, Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy explains her actions. This controversial personality disorder is described as involving a pattern of abuse in which a perpetrator physically falsifies illnesses in someone under their care, in order to attract attention.6. Belle Gunness Born: 1859; Died: 1931
Belle Gunness was one of America’s most profligate known female serial killers. At 6 ft (1.83 m) tall and over 200 lb (91 kg), she was a powerful Norwegian-American woman. She may have killed both of her husbands and all of her children (on different occasions), but she is known to have killed most of her suitors, boyfriends, and her two daughters Myrtle and Lucy. Her apparent motives involved collecting life insurance benefits. Reports estimate that she killed more than twenty people over several decades–some claim more than one hundred–and possibly got away with it. She became part of American criminal folklore, a female Bluebeard.5. Mary Ann Cotton Born: 1832; Died: 1873
Mary Ann Cotton was an English serial killer believed to have murdered up to 20 people, mainly by arsenic poisoning. Mary Ann, aged 20, married William Mowbray and they moved to Plymouth, Devon. The couple had five children, four of whom died from gastric fever or stomach pains. William and Mary Ann moved back to the Northeast and she had another three children, all of whom died. He died of an intestinal disorder in January 1865. William’s life was insured by the British Prudential Insurance office and Mary Ann collected a pay out of £35 on his death. That was to become a familiar theme. Her second husband, George Ward, also died of intestinal problems, as did one the two of her remaining living children. After the death of yet another child, the local newspapers latched on to the story and discovered Mary Ann had moved around northern England and lost three husbands, a lover, a friend, her mother and a dozen children, all of whom had died of stomach fevers. She washanged at Durham County Gaol on 24 March, 1873. She died slowly, the hangman having misjudged the drop required for a “clean” execution.4. Ilse Koch Born: 1906; Died: 1967
Koch was the wife of Karl Koch, the commandant of the concentration camps Buchenwald from 1937 to 1941 and Majdanek from 1941 to 1943. Ilse is infamous for taking souvenirs from the skin of murdered inmates with distinctive tattoos. She was variously known as “the Witch of Buchenwald” (”Die Hexe von Buchenwald”) and “the Bitch of Buchenwald” (”Buchenwälder Schlampe”) by the inmates because of her sadistic cruelty and lasciviousness toward prisoners. In 1937 she came to Buchenwald not as a guard, but as the wife of the commandant. There, influenced by her husband and her power, she began torturing the inmates of the camp. In 1940 she built an indoor sports arena, which cost over 250,000 marks, most of which were taken from the inmates. In 1941 Ilse became an Oberaufseherin (”chief overseer”) over the few female guards who served at the camp. She committed suicide by hanging herself at Aichach women’s prison on September 1, 1967.3. Irma Grese Born: 1923; Died: 1945
Geese “worked” at the Nazi concentration camps of Ravensbrück, Auschwitz and Bergen Belsen. Dubbed the “Bitch of Belsen” by camp inmates for her cruel and perverse behavior, she is one of the most notorious of the female Nazi war criminals. In March 1943, Grese was transferred as a female guard to Auschwitz, and by the end of that year she was Senior Supervisor, the second highest-ranking woman at the camp, in charge of around 30,000 Jewish female prisoners. In January 1945, Grese briefly returned to Ravensbrück before ending her wartime career at Bergen-Belsen as a Work Service Manager from March to April, being captured by the British April 17, 1945. The accusations against her centered on her ill treatment and murder of those imprisoned at the camps, including setting dogs on inmates, shootings and sadistic beatings with a whip. Survivors provided extensive details of murders, tortures, cruelties and sexual excesses engaged in by Grese during her years at Auschwitz and Bergen-Belsen. They testified to her acts of sadism, beatings and arbitrary shooting of prisoners, savaging of prisoners by her trained and half starved dogs, and her selecting prisoners for the gas chambers. Grese was reported to have habitually worn heavy boots and carried a whip and a pistol. She used both physical and emotional methods to torture the camp’s inmates and allegedly enjoyed shooting prisoners in cold blood. She beat some women to death and whipped others using a plaited whip.
2. Katherine Knight Born: 1956
Katherine Knight is the first Australian woman to be jailed for the term of her natural life. She was convicted in October 2001 of the murder of her de facto husband, John Charles Thomas Price. According to the Apprehended Violence Order that Price had filed against Knight, she had a previous history of violence in relationships; she had smashed the dentures of one of her ex-husbands, and slashed the throat of another husband’s eight-week-old puppy before his eyes. Price had also received death threats from her on previous occasions. On or about 29 February 2000, Knight stabbed Price to death with a butcher’s knife while chasing him around their home. The autopsy revealed that Price had been stabbed at least 37 times, in both the front and back of his body. Many of the wounds were deep and extended into vital organs. After Price was killed, Knight skinned him and hung his skin from a meat hook on the architrave of a door in their living room. She then decapitated him and placed the head in a pot on the stove, baked flesh from his buttocks, and prepared vegetables and gravy to serve as a meal to his children, which was accompanied by vindictive notes from Knight. Police found the meal before the children arrived home.1. Elizabeth Bathory Born: 1560; Died: 1614
Bathory was a Hungarian countess. She is considered the most infamous serial killer in Hungarian and Slovak history and is remembered as the Bloody Lady ofČachtice (Csejte), after the castle near Trenčín (Trencsén), in Royal Hungary, in present-day Slovakia, where she spent most of her life. After her husband’s death, she and her four alleged collaborators were accused of torturing and killing dozens of girls and young women. In 1610, she was imprisoned in Čachtice Castle, where she remained until her death three years later. Her nobility allowed her to avoid trial and execution. In 1610, King Matthias (spurred on by rumors) sent men to investigate Bathory. The men reportedly found one girl dead and one dying. Another woman was found wounded and others locked up. Her initial victims were local peasant girls, many of whom were lured to Čachtice by offers of well-paid work as maidservants in the castle. Later she may have begun to kill daughters of lower gentry, who were sent to her gynaeceum by their parents to learn courtly etiquette. Abductions seem to have occurred as well. The most consistently described atrocities collected from testimony of witnesses are: severe beatings over extended periods of time, often leading to death, burning or mutilation of hands, sometimes also of faces and genitalia, biting the flesh off the faces, arms and other bodily parts, starving of victims. The use of needles was also described. The number of young women tortured and killed by Elizabeth Báthory is unknown, though it is often cited as being in the hundreds, between the years 1585 and 1610. The idea that Countess Bathory bathed in thblood of her victims is folklore. Elizabeth was never brought to trial but remained under house arrest in a single room until her death.
Posted by
Bonnie
at
12:28 PM
0
comments
Labels: Fucked Up, To Bad So Sad
Monday, November 19, 2007
Celeb Videos Solicit Money for You Via e-mail
Dell site helps you troll for gift cash
Celeb videos solicit money for you via e-mail
Hoping to boost holiday sales, Dell Inc. has enlisted Burt Reynolds, Ice T and other celebrities to help customers raise money to buy products for themselves or others.
On Friday, the company launched http://www.YoursIsHere.com , where visitors are able to create a virtual piggy bank to which friends and relatives can donate money for gifts. The site has tools to create e-mail distribution lists, and gift-seekers can embed their fundraising requests on their Facebook and MySpace pages.
The e-mails are embedded with celebrity video clips, each pitch based on a theme. advertisement
Actress Estelle Harris, who starred in the television sitcom Seinfeld as George's nagging mom, solicits funds through the "guilt sell."
"Not that it's any of my business, but you usually get them a thoughtless gift every year, anyway," she groans. "Would it kill you to get them something nice this holiday season?"
Consumers must be age 18 and older to enlist in the virtual fund and have a PayPal account to receive money.
Admittedly, there's no way to guarantee the money will be used for Dell gear, said David Clifton, the marketing and communication director of Dell's consumer business.
With the popularity of social Internet hangouts such as Facebook, the strategy tries to get consumers engaged with each other on Dell products, rather than Dell just pitching them directly, Clifton said.
He said the e-mail pitches will come from each individual's e-mail, not Dell. He added that the service includes tools that would prevent people from spamming thousands of contacts.
"It's not like we decided we needed a Web 2.0 campaign," Clifton said. "It was taking a look at what our customers are doing."
Dell tried a similar approach this fall for students seeking notebooks and other gear, and company executives said the campaign's success led them to expand on the idea for the major holidays, Clifton said.
The online fundraising promotion is part of Dell's multimillion-dollar holiday marketing campaign, which also will feature television spots and a celebrity event next month in New York's Times Square.
Posted by
Bonnie
at
7:00 AM
0
comments
Labels: Cool
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
The Top 20 Most Bizarre Experiments of All Time
The Top 20 Most Bizarre Experiments of All Time
Posted by
Bonnie
at
7:42 AM
0
comments
Labels: Bizarre, Fucked Up, To Bad So Sad, Unusual
Friday, November 9, 2007
A New Medication That Can Make You Feel Alive
A New Medication That Can Make You Feel Alive
Alcohol as a medication. YES....this can cure shyness and so much more. There a side affects which are discussed...
Begin feeling better today!
Posted by
Bonnie
at
6:00 AM
0
comments
Labels: Funny Video
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
Famous people answer the most asked question in the world....why did the chicken cross the road? Now you will know
KEN STARR:
I intend to prove that the chicken crossed the road at the behest of the President of the United States of America in an effort to distract law enforcement officials and the American public from the criminal wrongdoing our highest elected official has been trying to cover up. As a result, the chicken is just another pawn in the president's ongoing and elaborate scheme to obstruct justice and undermine the rule of law. For that reason, my staff intends to offer the chicken unconditional immunity provided he co-operates fully with our investigation. Furthermore, the chicken will not be permitted to reach the other side of the road until our investigation and any Congressional follow-up investigations have been completed. (We also are investigating whether Sid Blumenthal has leaked information to the Rev. Jerry Falwell, alleging the chicken to be homosexual in an effort to discredit any useful testimony the bird may have to offer, or at least to ruffle his feathers.)
PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.
DR. SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes!
The chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed,
I've not been told!
ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
To die. In the rain.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.:
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
GRANDPA:
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
ARISTOTLE:
It is in the nature of chickens to cross the road.
KARL MARX:
It was a historical inevitability.
SADDAM HUSSEIN:
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
RONALD REAGAN:
What chicken?
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK:
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
FOX MULDER:
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?
FREUD:
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken 98, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook-and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.
EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?
BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken please?
LOUIS FARRAKHAN:
The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.
THE BIBLE:
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
COLONEL SANDERS:
I missed one?
Posted by
Bonnie
at
4:56 AM
0
comments
Labels: Funny Lists
Monday, November 5, 2007
161 Condom Slogans
161 Condom Slogans
1) Cover your stump before you hump
2) Before you attack her, wrap your whacker
3) Don't be silly, protect your Willie
4) When in doubt shroud you spout
5) Don't be a loner, cover your boner
6) You can't go wrong, if you shield your dong
7) If your not going to sack it, go home and whack it
8) If you think she's spunky, cover your monkey
9) It will be sweeter if you wrap your peter
10) If you slip between her thighs, condomize
11) She won't get sick if you wrap your dick
12) If you go into heat, package your meat
13) While your undressing Venus, dress up your penis
14) When you take off her pants and blouse, suit up your mouse
15) Especially in December, gift wrap your member
16) Never ever deck her, with an unwrapped pecker
17) Don't be a fool, vulcanize your tool
18) The right selection, is to protect your erection
19) Wrap it in foil, before you check her oil
20) A crank with armor, will never harm her
21) If you really love her, wear a cover
22) Don't make a mistake, cover your snake
23) Sex is cleaner with a packaged wiener
24) If you can't shield your rocket, leave it in your pocket
25) No glove, no love
26) If you think she'll sigh, cover old one eye
27) Even If she's eager, protect her beaver
28) No one likes a horses ass, protect yourself at climax
29) Shield her from the hunt until you shoot her in the cunt
30) Avoid a frown, contain your clown
31) Harness the pygmy man before entering the bearded clam
32) Constrain the little head before you stick it in the shed
33) Put a condom on your dink before you dart it in her sink
34) The weasel you must surround before you please her on the ground
35) Cloak the joker before you poke her
36) Encase that torch before you paint her porch
37) Cape your throbber before you bob her
38) After detection sheath your erection
39) Before you penetrate hide your magistrate
40) Don't surprise her plug your Geyser
41) Cover that lumber before you pump her
42) Protect her wrinkle before you sprinkle
43) She won't bristle if you wrap your whistle
44) House your noodle then release your strudel
45) Put your dog in the pound and make her yelp like a hound
46) Shelter your jerky then nab that turkey
47) Cage that snake then shake and bake
48) Cover your peter it will be much neater
49) Coat that Labrador then allow him to explore
50) It's always funky to cage your monkey
51) It won't be funny with a coatless dummy
52) It won't be fun with an unwrapped thumb
53) It's not much money to catch your honey
54) Don't be a fool cover your tool
55) Hood that match then scratch that thatch
56) Stitch that switch then itch her niche
57) Wrap that tool to catch the drool
58) It ain't no jibe to protect her hive
59) Contain that sputum before you use him
60) Restrain your log then plow her bog
61) Glove your pecker before you check her
62) Coat that slimmer before you prime her
63) Condomize then womanize (or sodomize)
64) Cover old pete then grind her meat
65) Guard your peter before you meet her
66) Check your list before you tryst
67) Wrap your bate before you mate
68) Can your worm before you squirm
69) Cover your pipe you dumb ass wipe
70) Contain your lizard then tickle her gizzard
71) Bag the mole then do her hole
72) Cuff your carrot before you share it
73) Jail your number then call the plumber
74) Cover your vein then drive her insane
75) Wrap that pickle then slip her a tickle
76) Protect your dink then fluff her mink
77) Restrain your lantern then stick it in her cavern
78) Hide ole harry then take her cherry
79) Wrap that spout then bore her out
80) Conceal your train don't cause her pain
81) Guard your bridge then do her ridge >
82) Shroud your trout then make her shout
83) To make her squat like a turkey, cover your Jerky
84) Box your blister then poke her in the whiskers
85) Wrap your spout to catch the trout
86) Plug your funnel then enter the tunnel
87) Cover your steamer before you ream her
88) Protect that fish then dip it in the dish
89) Contain that bass for a swim in her glass
90) Be sure to wear it to feed her ferret
91) Clothe the boner before you hone her
92) Got no protection? Can't use your erection!
93) Cork your pump or you don't hump
94) No unwrapped stags get between my legs
95) Dress that erection to make a deflection
96) Contain that shanker before you spank her
97) Cap that seeder before you breed her
98) Stop the stream before you cream
99) Secure that ladder then drain your bladder
100) Protect your screw to catch that glue
101) Package your meat for a real neat treat
102) Holster your gun then shootings more fun
103) Canvas that trailer before you nail her
104) Garage the tractor then attack her
105) Net that grass hopper before you pop her
106) Sock that wanger before you bang her
107) Pen that rooster, she'll be much looser
108) Trim your hardwood then do her real good
109) Garnish your oak then give her a poke
110) Pouch your associate then go fornicate
111) Smother your affiliate before you ejaculate
112) Confine your fascinate before it regurgitates
113) Catch that goat before it bloats
114) Ensnare that barbarian then do her abdomen
115) Restrain your hammer then wam bam her
116) Prune that stalk then make her squawk
117) Wrap that rod then please her bod
118) Sheath that knife she ain't your wife
119) House that bottle then mash her throttle
120) Sash that hash then thrash that gash
121) Cover your diddle then fiddle her middle
122) Can your knob then throb her swab
123) Contain old Doug then clean her rug
124) Cover your limb before you swim
125) Retain your bailer then impail her
126) Rope your dope then make some soap
127) Net your salamander then make salad in her
128) Cap your flapper then sniff her snapper
129) Wrap that Steed then trample her weeds
130) Hat that chef then scramble her cleft
131) Cover your stone before you bone
132) House your hose then curl her toes
133) Saddle your penis then straddle her mean ass
134) Blanket your twitch then hump that bitch
135) Shield your rocks then pond her box
136) Cover old sly then do her dry
137) Wrap your rail then fill her pail
138) Glove your chimney before you come in me
139) If your nude tube your dude
140) Cloak your hitter then go split her
141) Wrap your nipper before you dip her
142) Can your spam then bam that mam
143) Corral your ram then slice her ham
144) Sheath your sliver then jab her liver
145) Twist your wick then stick that prick
146) Cover old Bart then dart her tart
147) Shed old spot then do her slot
148) Drawer your pip then split her lips
149) Contain that leach then mash her peach
150) Bag your elm then take the helm
151) Constrain your gem to catch the flem
152) Catch that head cheese or I won't spread these
153) Constrain that agate you ain't no faggot
154) Survey your land then plant her stand
155) Before you drive her protect that diver
156) Sack that slimy smelt then tan her beaver pelt
157) Wrap that stiffer then let him sniff her
158) Cover you post then slice her roast
159) Blanket old juicy then plug old loosey
160) Balloon your baboon the moon tune her poon
161) Contain that viper before you pipe her
Posted by
Bonnie
at
6:12 PM
0
comments
Labels: Fucked Up, Funny Lists
How to Shower Like a Woman - How to Shower Like a Man
How to Shower Like a Woman
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror make mental note to do more sit-ups.
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
10. Complain because your husband had been eating your gingernut and jaffa cake body wash.
11. Rinse conditioner off hair.
12. Shave armpits and legs.
13. Turn off shower.
14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
15. Get out of shower onto a floor towel. Dry with a towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
16. Hang floor towel on side of tub.
17. Check entire body for zits, tweeze unwanted hairs.
18. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
19. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
How To Shower Like a Man
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your face.
6. Wash your armpits.
7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.
9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
11. Shampoo your hair.
12. Taste your wife's ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
13. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
14. Pee.
15. Rinse off and get out of shower. (What's a floor towel?)
16. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
17. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
18. Leave shower curtain open, water on floor, light and fan on.
19. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
20. Throw wet towel on bed.
Posted by
Bonnie
at
6:08 PM
0
comments
Labels: Funny Lists, Weird

